How do horses help us keep New Year’s resolutions? | Sponsored by Sue Dixon

Now that we have moved into the first few weeks of January many of the well-intentioned resolutions set a few weeks ago may have become distant aspirations. When we set those goals and don’t have a plan for navigating the obstacles that get in our way, we can find ourselves ill-equipped to reach the goals we set.

Don’t despair! There is good news in this, formulating a goal is a huge step; not realizing the goal because of obstacles is also good news too because you now have knowledge. How does a horse help with this? 

I had a client who came to see me because they were struggling with sadness in their life. The goal of “realizing more happiness in life” was represented by two pylons 6’ apart. They would have to lead the horse between the pylons to realize the goal. Before moving to the goal, they had to determine what the obstacles were in reaching it and then build those obstacles in the arena. 

Their first obstacle was self-care; getting the right amount of exercise and sleep; this was represented by a large yoga ball they would walk around with the horse. Their second obstacle was memories from the past contributing to their sadness represented by an elevated pole they would lead the horse over and, finally, their third obstacle was loneliness represented by pylons scattered about in a pattern they would weave the horse through. The person determined they would start with the loneliness obstacle, then the self-care one, and then the one representing memories from the past. By identifying potential obstacles to reaching the goal the person was being proactive and setting themselves up for success. 

The person then shared with the horse their goal and obstacles. They shared with me they had never led a horse and couldn’t imagine how they could get through the course. They planned their route, took a deep breath, imagined it going well, and walked with confidence to the first obstacle.

As they arrived at the pylons the horse picked one up with their lips and tossed it. I asked the client what this might mean about loneliness and they started to laugh and said “it means I need to lighten up and quit feeling sorry for myself about being lonely”. They proceeded to walk the horse through the remaining pylons and stopped, a few had fallen over as the horse stepped on them and I asked the client if they observed this and what it might mean. They shared they did observe this and that sometimes when they try new things to help with loneliness, like participating in events, they don’t always enjoy them; this was the fallen pylons. They then shared this is when they usually quit trying new things. I asked them how they managed this with the pylons and said they didn’t give up, they kept going and that’s what they need to do when trying new things; not give up.

We proceeded to the yoga ball of self-care, the horse walked to it eagerly, almost leading them there, and stopped right beside it. We talked about what self-care strategies this person could bring into their life and they came up with some great ideas. Spending less time on social media and eating less junk food. They then prepared to move to the next obstacle and the horse wouldn’t move. They could lead the horse around the ball but the horse wouldn’t move to the elevated pole. We stayed at the yoga ball and the person continued to identify strategies for self-care: Spend 10 minutes a day walking and increase that incrementally each week. They then tried to move the horse to the pole, but no luck; the horse wouldn’t budge, and weighing 1200 lbs one can’t make that happen. I asked the client what this means about their memories from the past, they shared: I need to exercise self-care in my life before I tackle my past. I invited them to lead the horse to the goal of realizing more happiness in life with the two pylons 6’ apart and the horse willingly led them there.

When I asked the person what they know about their goal they smiled and said, “the message is clear I need to lighten up, not give up, look after myself, and then explore my past when I’m ready”.

Realizing goals is often contingent on being proactive on how to manage obstacles that get in our way! Don’t give up!

Sue Dixon, owner of Partnering Horses with Humans, is a Certified Equine Assisted Learning Facilitator through Horse Spirit Connections and Cartier Farms (Dreamwinds), and a Registered Coach through Equestrian Canada. Sue and her beloved horse Egalie were the 2014 champions of the beginner division of the North East Trillium Hunter Jumper Association.  Sue has a degree in Sociology from the University of Waterloo.

Sue has 33 years of experience working at a local corporation with leadership in quality and health and safety. Sue’s role with Partnering Horses with Humans is that of facilitator; helping clients find their own wisdom by tapping into the horse’s wisdom. Sue operates her business out of two locations and offers services and workshops to individuals, couples, families and workplace.